Obama gets Mad mag treatment

via The Swamp

We all know that President Barack Obama has assumed the presidency at a time when that pressure cooker of a job is even more so right now because of the worst recession since the Great Depression and two foreign wars.

So Mad Magazine’s new Obama cover spoofs the notion of the president’s first 100 days but accelerates it to his first “100 minutes.”

The caricature shows a completely stressed-out Obama puffing on several cancer sticks simultaneously as he holds his head in his hands. (That’s what happens when the world knows your’re a reformed smoker who admits to occasional lapses.) An open bottle of Pepto Bismol is on the desk, as is a bottle of Excedrin.

Meanwhile, splayed out on the desk before Obama are newspapers (including the Chicago Tribune!) with blaring headlines like “Automakers Broke!” “Taliban Threat!” and “Dow Crashes!”

The only thing the artist missed was the chance to take a swipe at the president for those those Alfred E. Newman ears of his. Talk about your low-hanging fruit.

 

Separately, Mad will have a lot fewer cracks at Obama. DC Comics, Mad’s publisher, has announced that the magazine will be published on a quarterly basis instead of monthly, thanks to the economy and the advertising revenue woes afflicting the entire media industry.

Store Closing, Bankruptcies Loom as Retail Bounces Back from Horrible Holiday Sales

via Bloomberg

Dec. 29 (Bloomberg) — U.S. retailers face a wave of store closings, bankruptcies and takeovers starting next month as holiday sales are shaping up to be the worst in 40 years.

Retailers may close 73,000 stores in the first half of 2009, according to the International Council of Shopping Centers. Talbots Inc. and Sears Holdings Corp. are among chains shuttering underperforming locations.

More than a dozen retailers, including Circuit City Stores Inc., Linens ‘n Things Inc., Sharper Image Corp. and Steve & Barry’s LLC, have sought bankruptcy protection this year as the credit squeeze and recession drained sales. Investors will start seeing a wide variety of chains seeking bankruptcy protection in February when they file financial reports, said Burt Flickinger.

“You’ll see department stores, specialty stores, discount stores, grocery stores, drugstores, major chains either multi- regionally or nationally go out,” Flickinger, managing director of Strategic Resource Group, a retail-industry consulting firm in New York, said today in a Bloomberg Radio interview. “There are a number that are real causes for concern.”

Sales at stores open at least a year probably dropped as much as 2 percent in November and December, the ICSC said last week, more than the previously projected 1 percent decline. That would be the largest drop since at least 1969, when the New York-based trade group started tracking data. Gap Inc. and Macy’s Inc. are among retailers that will report December results on Jan. 8.

[Op-Ed] Hey U.S., Welcome to the Third World!

via LA Times

Dear United States, Welcome to the Third World!

It’s not every day that a superpower makes a bid to transform itself into a Third World nation, and we here at the World Bank and the International Monetary Fund want to be among the first to welcome you to the community of states in desperate need of international economic assistance. As you spiral into a catastrophic financial meltdown, we are delighted to respond to your Treasury Department’s request that we undertake a joint stability assessment of your financial sector. In these turbulent times, we can provide services ranging from subsidized loans to expert advisors willing to perform an emergency overhaul of your entire government.

As you know, some outside intervention in your economy is overdue. Last week — even before Wall Street’s latest collapse — 13 former finance ministers convened at the University of Virginia and agreed that you must fix your “broken financial system.” Australia’s Peter Costello noted that lately you’ve been “exporting instability” in world markets, and Yashwant Sinha, former finance minister of India, concluded, “The time has come. The U.S. should accept some monitoring by the IMF.”